Utilizing Spiritual Energy Effectively and Wisely Choosing Relationships
... In a crazy, craven, consumerist anti-spiritual world
“Every expenditure and sharing of life energy is a choice. You can share and spend, but you are not required to. Being spirit in a human body does not obligate you to simply “shine” on everyone. Quite the opposite: Being spiritual requires deep listening and receiving as to whether another being can honor and respect your energy. If others are demonstrably exploitative or ignorant of your value and energy, it is not wise to share yourself. It merely wastes what God has gifted you, and, perhaps worse, degrades your spiritual integrity.”— Zeus Yiamouyiannis, Ph.D.
“Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.”— Jesus in Matthew 5:10
Introduction
Timeless spiritual writings and prophets instruct us to be champions of the suffering, and to offer our own suffering up to our spirit. In Buddhism, this is called being a “bodhisattva” or “compassionate warrior”. In Christianity, this is one with taking up the Cross. But nowhere do these writings advise us to enable abusers, to allow ourselves to serve as scapegoats, or to reenact Jesus’ sacrifice for everyone.
Though it is true that all humans suffer, it is NOT true that all do so mindfully and responsibly. Far too many people use their power and persuasion to simply DUMP their misery on a convenient carrier, and to EXTRACT life energy to make up for their own alienation from their spirits. These people seek a human target to supply them with their own life energy, goodness, truth, beauty, and love, rather than do the difficult and rewarding work of acknowledging their challenges and seeking help from God and from their own holy spirits.
Who taught you that is was somehow Jesus-like and noble to sacrifice yourself, your energy, and your well-being to an IGNOBLE person? They did— the ignoble people! Predators, narcissists, fake victims, and so on, don’t simply play upon our sympathies; they actively groom us to believe it is OUR spiritual purpose to cater to their craven, desperate, anti-spiritual purposes.
These anti-spiritual denizens are the ones with the need for “supply,” whether it is vampires in movies needing real human blood, or emotional vampires needing the blood of sympathy and service to continue their “life”, the principle is the same— getting a target to “open their window” and invite the vampire in. This is usually done by some kind of seduction, driven by the promise that the vampire can give you a unique something— some power, some love, some recognition, some affection— no one else can offer.
This may come in the form of “love bombing,” but that is just the hook. You are cajoled into thinking: “This is a relationship made in heaven,” while they entice you into a hell where your most ardent and sincere efforts will never be enough.
Love bombing is an emotional manipulation technique that involves giving someone excessive compliments, attention, or affection to eventually control them. You may not be able to spot love bombing until you’re in the midst of it because it may feel like being swept off your feet at the start of a new relationship. Love bombing often points to the beginning of an unhealthy, toxic, or abusive relationship.
So these people still deserve compassion and pity? Certainly. They ought to receive deeply-felt prayer for their inappropriate, irresponsible, and abusive projection of their own suffering on others. They ought to receive prayers and straight-talk for their trust issues and insecure, controlling attachment style. What they DO NOT deserve is YOU.
“Do not give what is holy to the dogs; nor cast your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you in pieces."— Jesus in Matthew 7:6
This is where discernment comes in. That which is hell will almost always pass itself off as heaven. Of course! Who is going to jump into eternal flames willingly? But if I can convince you that I am an angel bringing you something you deeply need (and that you cannot provide yourself) OR if I come off as a broken-winged bird upon whom you can exercise your desire to care and heal, I’ve got you hooked. And there is no intoxicant quite as powerful as the misleading spiritual intoxicant of service to the unserviceable— the godlike belief that your own spirit can work for and rescue two.
So the first thing to be aware of is your own tendency toward “spiritual bypass” or SPIRITUALIZING unspiritual needs in YOURSELF in order to create a short-cut to meeting worldly emotional, psychological, or physical needs in you and others. Love bombers frequently use sex to try and target all three of these needs.
Discernment in most people is impeded by a naive desire to do good and be seen as good. It does no one any good, least of all you, to enable abuse. In so doing, you are rewarding behavior that makes things perhaps temporarily better, but ALWAYS worse in the medium- to long-term. It does no good for you to gain approval in a romantic relationship, “friendship” (serious air quotes here!), or family situation while deepening dependencies and avoiding the root cause of dysfunction.
“And if any place will not welcome you or listen to you, leave that place and shake the dust off your feet as a testimony against them.”— Jesus in Mark 6:11
Ahh. So we learn a little and we are emotionally and spiritually aware enough to detect our own vulnerability to manipulation and our own tendency toward uncritical do-gooding. We have learned to spot the over-the-top displays of affection, or guilt-tripping, or shows of favor and esteem for what they are— attempts to rope us into an exploitative dynamic where we give and give and the other person takes and takes.
We call it out… and the sh*t hits the fan. “HOW DARE YOU” acknowledge or mention this family’s dirty secrets. We are respectable people!” “How dare you ask me, your romantic partner, to apologize, change their disrespectful or abusive, and/or go to counseling. Why, this is YOUR problem not mine!” “How dare you deny your lifelong “friend” a two-thousand dollar “loan” (more serious air quotes) right when they are at their lowest!”
Perfect response: “It doesn’t seem as if you trust or respect my honest judgement. Therefore, I am taking leave.” And you walk out the door and shake the dust off your feet. You can communicate your timeline and conditions, but victimhood-claiming victimizers never honored those in the past, so why would they now? They need you to supply them at any cost to you, and you oppositely need your values and self-respect to be more important than their demands. (This walking-out tactic by the way also works with a bratty toddler who demands you buy something for them at a store. You simply leave the cart and explain to the cashier that you have a disorderly child and head for the car. From the parents who have used this, I did not hear of a single repeat incident!)
What are the operating spiritual and practical principles here? Life energy comes from ACTUAL goodness and REAL spirit. It is only enhanced and honored voluntarily, openly, and honestly with sincere appreciation and reciprocity. If these things do not come, then it is time to exit or limit your involvement. This can be directly communicated, but may require what is called “greyrocking” if the person is especially devious or volatile.
The Grey Rock Method, also known as grey rocking, is a communication strategy used to disengage from toxic or abusive individuals by becoming emotionally unresponsive and inconspicuous, like a "grey rock" This technique minimizes emotional engagement, depriving the toxic person of the reactions they seek, and is especially helpful in unavoidable interactions, such as with coworkers, co-parents, or family members.— AI summary, Brave Browser, March 24, 2025
To “grey rock” a person involves making all interactions with them as uninteresting and unrewarding as possible. In general, this means giving short, straightforward answers to questions and hiding emotional reactions to the things a person says or does.— Medical News Today
Conclusion: Spiritual methods for self-enhancement, sovereignty, and growth
Abusers and manipulators of one’s spirit succeed by making it all about them and you reacting to them. They hate being irrelevant. But there is the other side: Not only must you stop yourself from “supplying” a spiritual and emotional succubus, but you need to positively restore your own faith, love, and energy through RENEWAL practices that heal and strengthen your own being.
Here are five areas of concentration and practice to take back yourself and place yourself firmly into the hands of your own spirit:
Breath in
“Let be born in me in each breath I breathe, a renewal, a confirmation of life and spirit itself. I am a child of God, no lesser or grander than any great or little thing in the universe. In each breath let me be born again, illuminated and warmed by the eternal love from which I am constituted. I breathe this love. I am born again with each breath, and made whole and new again with each breath. Falling away are the husks of insults and trials. I am ever renewed and renewing. In every breath, I shall soak up grace with gratitude and I shall exude compassion, peace, and the eternal power of the creative spirit.”
Breath out
“I give up my injuries and assumptions, and allow to die all the things in me that stand in the way of my deeper relation with and reliance upon spirit. Let all ego and profanity flee into the night. That person I wanted to prove something to; I surrender this desire. That relationship I thought I could save; I surrender this desire. This attempt at worldly success that failed; I surrender this self-pity. This ambition to be well-known and liked and have an storied impact on the world; I surrender it to the wisdom of God. May my heart may be better served to be shown my truer, inner purpose. I offer them all up on the altar of spirit. Thank you, thank you, thank you for taking these burdens from me, these expectations, these attachments to outcomes, these relationships. Thank you for unburdening me from all the anchors and delusions of a suffering world.”
Energy and money
“I will give my energy purely to those who can honor it with appreciation, growth, and generosity. I will serve the truly humbled and those in clear, concrete need, and I will let fall away all those simply trying to gain my service for needs that only their own spirits can fulfill. I will only give money in small amounts to meet present needs and seed the future for those people and organizations that have consistently shown that this money shall be used for a higher, spirit-honoring purpose. I will withdraw all money from those who promise lofty goals, but who simply fund themselves. I will not invest in my own vanity or materialistic “dreams.” I shall do critical research and directly question the use of my gifts in time, talent, treasure, and trust to ensure, as best as I am able, that I am supporting something worthy and not supporting something unworthy.”
Non-violent disobedience
“I shall be a positive rebel, a spiritual subversive, against all violence, abuse, and exploitation in the world. I will not emotionally react to the anti-spiritual ways of the world. I shall see truly into the heart that which surrounds me. I shall pray for deliverance of the suffering, and I shall have courage to challenge those who create injustice, even at cost to me, my reputation, and my future worldly prospects. I shall stick up for the little guy. I shall boycott attention and allegiance to the brutal. I shall divest money and energy from all that seeks to gain advantage on the backs of the powerless. I shall exert sanctions against any company or country that seeks to use me or assumes my cooperation to leverage its own dominance. I shall use humor to laugh at the naked emperors whose fine clothes mask an empty spirit. Full and powerful spirit is the only essence I serve.”
Purity and health
“I shall dedicate myself to the increasing purity and health of my being in body, mind, heart, and soul. I shall abandon that which keeps me down, and adopt that which brings me up. May I be humbled so that I may be cleaned out. May I recognize my spiritual poverty, so that I may be filled from the most high. May I have thoughts and feelings of peacemaking, so that I may make peace. May I be pure of heart so that I can give my life fully to the utmost. May I always recognize and realize that I am a beloved child of God charged with only two things: to love my neighbor, and to love God and Spirit with everything I am and everything I possess.”
All blessings, Zeus
“In every breath, I shall soak up grace with gratitude and I shall exude compassion, peace, and the eternal power of the creative spirit.” I love this! There is so much power in these words. Do you sense that people who tend to take from others can change? How does this happen?